no sound but clock that keep moving forward.
i am awake and find myself in the middle of the silence. waiting for the dawn. actually waiting for sahur in this 3rd ramadhan day.
this is a sacret and holy month. we, moslem around the world do fasting from the dawn until sunset. we hold on from eat, drink, emotional catastrophy and sexual desire. this is in order to practice us to be better person.
people intentionally do fasting and hope that they would get what so called ‘hidayah’ from Allah. you know, such as the help to make us closer to God.
i found my ‘hidayah’ already. i know God must loves me cause He sent it to me with an extraordinary way. it came in the form of a perfect stranger that i just know his name, and met him once. this meeting really makes me jumping and beat a lots. haha. charming inside and outside! this guy stops me from my part-time work for a while just to stupid blank starring at him. awkward me! yes i know, do-not-yelling-it-at-loud! lol.
perfect man. i scored him 9. i never scored this high, except for one debater from NTU Singapore that be the runner up last UADC in Bangkok. and since this debater guy *unfortunately* doesn’t have the same religious view with me, i stop in 9.
well, i guess it just an ordinary fascinated. you know, i am fall and fascinated by people easily. haha. until i get his facebook and i start to stalking behind.
geez! i know it sounds like a bit weird. he even doesn’t know me. it’s me, who know him and found out that he have the same organizational history with me, from the past. let’s say, he is my senior. and what stunned me out is the fact that Oh My Holy God! this perfect stranger is such kind of religious person, that concern on the issue of society, education, politics, and even a socialist in which a big supporter of Marxist i bet. and to make it more perfect, he is a Dutch blesteran and now studying in medicine major. oh wow, a future doctor and great leader.
now you know why on earth i increase the score to perfect 10 of 10!
in this cruel creppy world, people like him still exist. those who care to the ideas that might haveleft behind by another. those who pleasured, balancing their real and believeness, then practice it well. those who don’t care about majority perception, being a good rebel for the sake of value that they trust the most, and against the hypocrisy, hedonism, oppression, and so on.
ha ha ha. i take a shame. i don’t even realize what does it for, long before i read all the things wrote by him, his ideology. strange, very interesting! i start questioning myself, what dedication i gave for the people during my life? during my breath? during my heart beat? do i care, do i done something?!
i updating ‘menye2’ status, while he updating ‘pembangkit semangat’ status. i critisize government and make the world seems darker, he lit the light up. i got angry and mocking people, he remind people to get a meaning life.
what a paradox!
really, relly, in the whole of my life. i felt ashamed and small. i felt more than a jerk. i felt deserve to be thrown away togather with the scum.
“dan sebaik2 manusia adalah manusia yang bermanfaat bagi orang lain. -(HR. Thabrani dan Daruquthni)“
and the tears start to falling down…